Burned Out
I've recently been feeling very tired in both my mind and body. My body has been giving me pains all over. Its either a migraine, gas in my stomach, chest pains, joint pains, difficulty breathing and/or restless sleep.
I can't concentrate on my work and I have become easily frustrated and very irritable. Adding to this is the current blistering heat in Manila. "Galit sa mundo" is how I feel.
I think it is time to distance myself from everything and spend time with myself. I have to give my mind and body a chance to rest, regenerate, rejuvenate and be at peace once again. I have to learn to enjoy life once more and face each day with enthusiasm, excitement and a sense of adventure.
The worries of the day to day financial requirements, coupled with the feeling of emptiness and unworthiness has crept into my psyche. Maybe all I need is someone to assure me, comfort me and encourage me. Sadly, there is no one. I have people around me and yet, I feel alone. Am I expecting too much and just getting disappointed in the process? In fact, Maxie, our dog, seems to be the only one who can give me a sense of importance and worth. Life has become routine and boring. The vigor of my youth seems to have faded away and I try to wake up each day hoping that I would be transported back in time.
In the course of the past few years, this feeling has come and gone. Am I still in mid-life crisis mode? There are so many questions and doubts in my mind. I have tried to address these by keeping myself busy in the various companies I have set-up with friends. It was not the solution and in fact, it may have even aggravated the situation. I am so overwhelmed with tasks that I am so tired and confused already. In Pilipino, the term is "parang manok na walang ulo!"
I guess soul-searching is my next move and I have to do this ASAP to douse some cold, icy water into the fire that I feel is a major burn-out!
Maybe a week spent alone in Kali would do the trick.
Hmmm!!
I can't concentrate on my work and I have become easily frustrated and very irritable. Adding to this is the current blistering heat in Manila. "Galit sa mundo" is how I feel.
I think it is time to distance myself from everything and spend time with myself. I have to give my mind and body a chance to rest, regenerate, rejuvenate and be at peace once again. I have to learn to enjoy life once more and face each day with enthusiasm, excitement and a sense of adventure.
The worries of the day to day financial requirements, coupled with the feeling of emptiness and unworthiness has crept into my psyche. Maybe all I need is someone to assure me, comfort me and encourage me. Sadly, there is no one. I have people around me and yet, I feel alone. Am I expecting too much and just getting disappointed in the process? In fact, Maxie, our dog, seems to be the only one who can give me a sense of importance and worth. Life has become routine and boring. The vigor of my youth seems to have faded away and I try to wake up each day hoping that I would be transported back in time.
In the course of the past few years, this feeling has come and gone. Am I still in mid-life crisis mode? There are so many questions and doubts in my mind. I have tried to address these by keeping myself busy in the various companies I have set-up with friends. It was not the solution and in fact, it may have even aggravated the situation. I am so overwhelmed with tasks that I am so tired and confused already. In Pilipino, the term is "parang manok na walang ulo!"
I guess soul-searching is my next move and I have to do this ASAP to douse some cold, icy water into the fire that I feel is a major burn-out!
Maybe a week spent alone in Kali would do the trick.
Hmmm!!
posted by kofranks at 12:22 PM
3 Comments:
a week-end in kali is definitely needed, kofranks! please take some time for R&R because burn-out is a bad thing and hard to get over.
napansin ko lang that your body aches and pains are plaguing you still. sana makapag-masahe ka. those are indulgences we miss and i hope you take advantage of bec it is available readily in manila.
i feel medyo you need rinnah and aina also to comfort you during your times of need. sana ma-voice mo sa kanila. sometimes, a gentle ear and some himas can make it better.
meantime, please take that break. you have to recover the creative, generous, kind, and sensitive person that you are. huwag kang padadala sa upstairs--iwan mo na siya mentally and emotionally to protect yourself from her. think nalang na wala na yung dating pinsan mo and that there's really no one up there anymore.
i implore you to enjoy yourself. i know that your spiritual self has been healthy. but since it is your body calling out, you should address that, too. please do something you like.
what have you got to lose?
i wish you cool days, with lots of hugs from your loved ones. . .
minotte
I guess hugs and affection from loved ones is what i miss the most and what i've been longing for. Voiced out already to no avail. It seems i am not on top of their priority list. Shopping and spending come first followed by work. I feel like my Dad now.
hey franks,
it breaks my heart to read how burnt out and depressed you feel. treat yourself to something you enjoy! don't let the day to day stuff get to you. this may sound corny too, but i know it works... when all else fails, PRAY. it is an amazing and powerful thing.
kali sounds like a good idea too, good food, good music, your imagination, quiet time and maybe a bottle of wine (healthier than beer/lowers your cholesterol). sounds like heaven to me - sama ako. anyway, do come visit us para ma-iba ang scenery and get a new outlook on life. i'll be praying for you! take care of yourself.
lia
Post a Comment
<< Home